Choose Wisely!

It all begins with cigarettes and self abuse, fellows!

Two Paths: Boy


“But Miss K. LaMoine!” you say. “Surely the delicate sex is not also capable of wandering down the wrong path!”

My dear Readers, it is terribly all too true. Take heed.

Two Paths: Girl

A hearty thanks to Miss Emily W. for sharing this important information.

The Latest in Beachwear

1289185143-slut

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Bathing suit, bicycling costume. . .  either way, you’re still a slut, darling. 

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*For those needing their spectacles, the text reads:

Mother – “Gracious daughter, what an outrageous costume! And those stockings are shocking!”

Daughter – “Well, you see, ma, I hadn’t a bathing suit and was compelled to wear my bicycling costume.”

Mother – “O, well, that’s all right.”*

A Glimpse of Ankle: The Lady Porn Day Edition

legs

Dearest readers,

Once again, I am participating in a themed blog circular as presented by Ms. Rabbit Write. Just as last time we discussed make-up, this entry is for Lady Porn Day. I realize this is a most out-of-the-ordinary topic for Hersteria, but I feel it important to educate the masses as to smut’s place in history and its consequences. I have provided examples of the obscenities to which I refer as well as a handy guide to help gentlemen avoid licentiousness.

Maintain a vigilant and virtuous mind, dear readers, and remember: When you touch yourself, the saints cry.

Sincerely,

Miss K. LaMoine


A little side boob and derriere went a long way back then.

To be honest, this assignment was a bit of a stumper. I naturally assumed that somewhere within my library of antique sex and marriage manuals, an author would have addressed the issue of women and pornography. However, other than instructions on how to keep young girls from masturbating, there was nary a single mention as to a woman’s relationship to the erotic. It didn’t help that until relatively recently, there was barely, if any, porn made for women.

From these findings, I believe we can safely assume that women simply weren’t sexual before 1950. Moving on.

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Whereas modern porn is typically an all-or-nothing, take a good look at my how-do-you-do event, 19th- and early 20th-century smut was more evenly mixed. Sure, you could get your overt photos of folks coupling (often while wearing befuddling hats [NSFW]). But more often than not, the available photos and films were simply naughty: women in various states of undress, typically in a specific setting (the kitchen, the country, the boudoir), and almost always with a sly almost-smile.

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massage

Can you spot all the things wrong with this photo?

1. nudity and lingerie

2. murder

3. a woman in the workplace

(pic via Silent Porn Star)

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Even if there wasn’t a whole lot to see, there could be a whole lot to see, if you looked hard enough.  For better or worse, if a person was of a certain mind frame, the erotic/obscene could be found everywhere, just waiting to muddy otherwise virtuous minds. For some, this constant scanning for obscenities led to wild claims.

“The appeal to the amative and sexual nature is so universal in novels that it might safely be laid down as a rule that no young men or young women should be permitted to read a novel before they arrive at the age of twenty-five.” — What a Young Man Ought to Know (1904)

bike fix
Seven decades later, folks were downright blasé about actual nudity.

“Most pornography can be divided into two categories, visual and literary. These days most visual pornography consists of photos, all basically the same. The beginner’s collection shows naked women with emphasis on the breasts and genitalia. Since all females have identical equipment, if you see one, you’ve seen them all. Once the dramatic revelation that women have a clitoris, vagina, labia, and breasts sinks in, there are no more surprises.” — Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex but Were Afraid to Ask (1970)

Ho-hum, vaginas. Which is healthier: panic or boredom?

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Um, Miss? I … I don’t think that’s how you fix a bicycle.

(via Mistress Evelyn)

Bonus Material!

Hersteria’s Guide to Moral Purity

(You may notice that this is directed toward menfolk. I found it unnecessary to provide a similar list for women, as decent ladies do not harbor such thoughts.)

Gentlemen! Do not dwell upon the following:

• A lady’s bloomers or knickers                                  • Ladies wearing trousers
• Irises                                                                              • Velvet-lined gloves
• Stockings                                                                      • Muffs
• Lemon meringue                                                        • Omelets
• A well-folded beach blanket                                     • Bicycle seats
• Mason jars                                                                   • Drapery tassels
• Bare ankles                                                                  • Partially closed draperies.
• Bowling pins                                                               • Voting booths
• Side saddles                                                                • Boules of freshly risen dough
• Peach halves (with or without syrup)                    • Un-salted mackerel
• Conch shells                                                                • Dart boards
• Bananas                                                                       • Billiard pockets
• The works of Georgia  O’Keefe                                • Doilies
• Dictaphones                                                                • Hat pins
• Hat boxes                                                                     • Vulvas

 

 

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Sexy is where you find it.

 

 

*Thank-you to Mr. N. Marshall, Mr. J. Crock, Mr. P. Jurgaitis, and Mr. J. Thaxton for their help in list-making.

Pinkey’s Special (NSFW)

This post is a bit more scurrilous than I usually allow, but I thought it informative, if only so young ladies may see what happens when young men degrade themselves.


Menu from a 1920s brothel:

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Brothel menu

Take a closer gander.

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While I don’t agree with the services offered, it does seem that the Pinkey’s Special is well worth the $30.

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Via Tangled Up in Lace. Submitted by Miss Brandy.

What Is This World Coming To?!

Shocking Items as reported by Tweets of Old

• “Mrs. J.C. Anderson, a giddy young thing, and the mother of 16 children, has run away with a big-trousered dude 25 years of age.” OH 1889

That Pesky Bustle — “That ridiculous bustle is going to be “the fashion” again this summer. What self-respecting female sticks a hump on her back the size of a dollar’s worth of flour? It seems to a man up a tree like it’s time to call a halt and consider the bearings. We truly hope that the pretty girls of Winston will refrain from making themselves ridiculous by wearing the bustle this summer. We don’t care a snap what the ugly girls do about it.” – from The Winston Herald, March 15, 1894  (Alabama)

• WOMAN APPEARS IN COURT IN “PANTS”!

“In Judge Yager’s court this morning was the first woman to visit the court attired in the new style of garmenture. She was Mrs. Pearl Crouch, who offered the use of her automobile to convey some witnesses down to appear before the grand jury, among them her sister. Mrs. Crouch wore a suit built on the style of the soldiers uniform trousers during the war, only they were made of a neat pattern of wool. The suit included coat and trousers and was evidently new. She attracted considerable attention, as most of the men had not yet seen any woman so clad, on the streets and in public places, such as a court room. The style, it was explained, was one that they would probably see a great deal more of in the course of time, and they might even expect to see women wearing knickerbockers!”   –from the Alton Evening Telegraph, February 25, 1922

 

I know Tweets of Old is doing its journalistic duty, but really, some things are simply too upsetting to report.

Sharing the Blame

“While there is no difference, physically, between the union of persons who are married to each other, and a similar union between those not enjoying this relationship, there is a social and moral difference. The marital union is wholesome, while illicit intercourse of the sexes is one of the grossest evils.

Illicit or promiscuous intercourse is equally wrong for both parties engaged in it. The man is just as wrong, who indulges for the purpose of satisfying his passions, as is the girl who yields to his inducements and shares the corruption with him. In fact, since he is considered the stronger of the two, he is more in the wrong.”

–Mothers and Daughters

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Don’t worry–you’re all sluts!