Recently, while doing some research, I spied this theater hottie. Something tells me that he’s a real hoot to drink with. And by “a hoot,” I mean a messy, emotional drunk with a severe case of the Look-at-Mes. Even so. Gotta love a man who can rock a bonnet.
(via My Daguerreotype Boyfriend)
Hmmm. But what does this remind me of?
“A vast majority of such poor girls [who are promised love and marriage by beaus who want only sex] make their way to houses of ill-fame and give themselves over to a life of prostitution. Hardly one of these women, if married by the man who brought her to this condition, would have failed to make a true and loving wife and mother…”
– Dr. Hall’s Sexual Knowledge
Conveniently, we can now blame our exes for all of our sexual mistakes! Hooray!
It’s the third annual Hersteria Halloween costume guide! In posts past, I’ve shown you a number of exciting costume ideas, including Sexy Rollerskating Widow with George Washington Eyes and Sir Phoneface. This year I’ve drummed up even more thrilling and chilling disguises, sure to scare/entertain/allure/what-have-you. Let’s get to it!
Be the life of the Halloween party as an Eyeball with a Highball! Unfortunately, since television’s switch to digital, this costume only gets three local channels.
Don’t put that swimsuit away just yet! How about going as Sexy Clark Gable?
Don’t look now – it’s Mystery Swede!
No date to the Halloween party? No problem!
Take the Women Laughing Alone with Salad meme one further with this attractive Lonely Lettuce Woman costume!
Gather your girl-friends, put on those bloomers, and borrow your brother’s ball – you’re now a “Women’s Basket-ball Team“!
Oh, I kid. Can you imagine such a thing?!
Say, here’s one for the fellas! Grab a buddy and dress as the Creepy Twins from The Shining!
Here’s another great idea for a group Halloween costume! I call it “The American Dream.“
Happy Halloween, dear readers!
Listerated Pepsin Gum: Because She Might Be Filthy.
“If you are a gentleman, never lower the intellectual standard of your conversation in addressing ladies. Pay them the compliment of seeming to consider them capable of an equal understanding with gentlemen. You will, no doubt, be somewhat surprised to find in how many cases the supposition will be grounded on fact, and in the few instances where it is not the ladies will be pleased rather than offended at the delicate compliment you pay them. When you “come down” to commonplace or smalltalk with an intelligent lady, one of two things is the consequence, she either recognizes the condescension and despises you, or else she accepts it as the highest intellectual effort of which you are capable, and rates you accordingly.
Yes, at least pretend to think women are intelligent. Then let them go back to their hen parties and coupons and menstruating, or whatever witchery they’re up to nowadays.
“Nature has devised a retribution for illicit intercourse in the form of venereal disease. If the parties observe fidelity to their marriage vows, venereal disease is experienced in wedlock only on very rare occasions, and then through some accidental infection, as from contact with some public utensil, as a public water closet, a public towel or a drinking cup…
So prevalent are these venereal diseases among lewd women, whether prostitutes or clandestines, that specialists in the field say: ‘All lewd women are diseased part of the time, and some lewd women are diseased all of the time.’”
– Dr. Hall’s Sexual Knowledge
That’s right: Nature came up with venereal diseases because you’re a filthy slattern.
Now, where my crafters at? I think someone needs to stitch that last quote onto a sampler.
(Image via Monster IV Blood’s Etsy page)
First, Dear Readers, an apology: I’ve been absolutely awful at updating this site for the last, oh, nine months or so, and I do apologize. I’m sorry if you missed out on important (and antiquated) advice regarding sex, love, marriage, and filthy menstrual matters.
excuse explanation. My absence is due to the following:
1. Day job-wise, I moved from book publishing into web publishing. And guess what? Working on a website for 8+ hours a day kinda kills that inner fire to work on any personal writing!
2. This winter was a bear. A very unpleasant three-to-four months battling bad seasonal depression. Plus my dog died.
3. I’m getting married! This is extremely happy news, but it means my mind is stuffed to the brim with wedding-related ballyhoo.
Thankfully, I have plenty of marriage- and wedding-related resources to guide me into matrimonial bliss! After perusing through my archives both webby and paper, I’ve come up with a list of helpful marriage advice. Please, enjoy and pass on to any
fools friends who are also on their way down the aisle.
Hersteria’s Marriage Tips for Connubial Bliss
(Of course, if you’re interested in more vintage marriage advice, be sure to check the archives!)